Monday, August 18, 2008

Looking more and more different ... and that is okay

Yesterday we were at a friends cookout and really had a good time 3 other couple were there with a total of 3 amazing Neurotypical kids
Everybody was extremely nice and went out of there way to make R feel comfortable and included
SO many of our friends and their freinds are such nice people
Well R looked soooo different from the other kids - As it was a new situation he was so stimmy - he would flap his arms at the swing and just make all these odd grimaces
He always does this when he is stressed
But he was totally well mannered did not bother anybody and after a while I took him to their playroom where he got totally relaxed after playing in a LARGE room with just me and a lot of books about numbers
And then by the time it was time to leave - R did not want to go home at all
Anyway there were a few things that I learned
New places stress R out but that is Just all the more reason to go to new places
1. A little time away from the group in a group helps R deal better with the group
2. Maybe I should have prepared him a little ( picture schedule ?)
3. I am so proud of myself for not getting too antsy about how odd we looked
4.DH rocks - he is just so relaxed - when we came back I asked him if he felt awkward about the stimminess - he replied "It was their little girl right"
He ACTUALLY DID NOT EVEN NOTICE R stimming and in fact noticed that one of the other kids was going cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese on the swings. DH's general attitude in life is "I'm Okay " and I just soooo love it
5. Another reason my DH rocks is that he will probably keep dropping R to school on most days - so that R does not spend 75 minutes on the bus each morning


robin said...

I like what you learned about your outing and how it will probably help for future outings. Your DH sounds like a great father. And I'm so glad he's still taking R to school.

danette said...

Sounds like a successful and fun outing! Isn't it great when people make the effort to be nice and inclusive? I know I always appreciate that too. My kids tend to get stimmy in new situations too, I love your list of things learned and your dh sounds awesome!

Bonnie said...

My DH rocks too. Quiet time away is so important, I've taught G to tell me "I need to be alone" and that has helped a lot.

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