Sunday, September 26, 2010


Its been along and weary week and I have decided to have a guilt-free 2 days on the weekend

Some of my friends say they want an autism-free vacation

Autism –free vacations in my mind  are impossible

For me , I try to take vacation from my role as therapist mom and guilty mom

We have a lovely lazy day

DH and I watch movies

R coils around us – like a cat

Instructs me to do things that he his watching on the DVD

Flashlight games

Sing songs but instead of pointing use the flashlight to light the part

So sing "Toe, knee chest nut" but instead of touching – shine your flashlight on the toe on the knee

Create shadows out of numbers and say them out

Word games

Playing little word games ( it's a simple game we played since when he was 3 when I used to use any way to get into turn taking .. the rule is that you can change only one letter to make a different word )


And then not waiting for me to take my turn PIES

So the lazy day goes on

I think I see one car the whole day

I eye the woods longingly on Saturday evening

I am perishing to take a long walk..

I would take R but he will want to be carried in 10 minutes ( or less )

As R has been remarkably anxious about me leaving lately for anywhere but office – I don't really dare leave

I am a prisoner I whine reproachfully

DH smiles and tells me he will come with me so between us we can carry R when he asks to be carried

And so we walk together the three of us

This is one of my iconic moments – I tell DH smugly – its like we are a family from an advertisement

But its so much more -

It occurs to me how much I love these two and how much I love the three of  us

There are people who are good separately but then when you put they don't work together quite as well

We are better together

We play the 1..2…..3 game – where we swing R between us and raise him high  on 3 .

Much squeals of joy

And no, he does not ask to be carries
We read out the silly names of all the other cabins on the trail

A coy " Allison's dream" written with a flourish next to a box of fake flowers

To R , I am sure names lile "Kiss the moon" are quite perplexing and I see the wheels of his mind turning

We do a leaf color hunt ( oh how I love Fall )

An obliging spider has created a giant web of such fineness that it looks like the spider is walking in air so R can sing Itsy bitsy spider

There is such peace in these woods

So different from the hurry …do more…. do faster…  which is the rythm of my everyday

It occurs to me that there has to be a better way of doing things

Like the saying goes

"Nature is never in a hurry and yet everything gets done "


Mr. Daddy said...

K, I just love visiting your blog and reading your insights on life...

It doesn't sound like you ever get a vacation from therapist Mom. And I think that is because of how it is so much of who you are...

The guilty Mom thing???? shouldn't even be in your vocabulary....LOL

just saying....

I love that quote. "Nature is never in a hurry, yet everything gets done."

There is another by Eleonora Duse.

"If the sight of the blue skies fills you with joy, if a blade of grass springing up in the fields has power to move you, if the simple things of nature have a message that you understand, rejoice, for your soul is alive."

It is obvious that your soul is alive K. :o)

Big Daddy Autism said...

Those are the types of days you wish would last forever.

kathleen said...

I love your writing..beautiful poetry..I mentioned you in my latest blogpost...sigh...would have tagged you, but Kim beat me to it! :)

Þorgerður said...

Lovely.. lovely days :)

Anonymous said...

I feel lovelier and un-guiltily lazy just from reading this. It is a gift, my feeling, from you and your writing. Thank you. Barbara

Kris said...

Wonderful post! I love fall too and I hate being in a hurry which I always am with 4 kids. Reading your post is like taking a deep breath.

Brenda Rothman (Mama Be Good) said...

I am just now understanding that it's okay to take a break from therapist Mom ... it's a very hard thing to do. But sometimes, I tell myself, it's okay to do the laundry and okay to take a break.

Anonymous said...

I love that quote at the end! I wish I could be more like that! =) I know what you mean (I think) about the autism free vacation. It's part of our lives, so I how is it possible?? This week I just decided to be guilt free because I was going to read a book- for pleasure and I didn't really care what Daniel did until I finished it. Within reason, of course- but I let him entertain himself as he liked...tons of manipulating the audio book he was listening too, screen time, etc. It was lovely. (I've missed you, too. Thanks for the sweet notes on my blog in the past week or so. It's nice to know I'm missed sometimes. haha!)

Lynn said...

Oh, I love fall, and this post makes me love it even more.

Shovona said...

I loved this post and I have been longing for a holiday like this for ages...

It is true...
" what is this life so full of care
we have no time to stand ans stare"

Stephanie said...

This is a beautiful post. Though, I must admit, I'm not sure I remember how to slow down any more. If it's not the busyness that I am doing that has me whirring, then it's the busyness I'm not doing that has me worrying.

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