Friday, October 21, 2011

Fall in the Mountains

October gave a party; 
The leaves by hundreds came -
 The Chestnuts, Oaks, and Maples, 
And leaves of every name. 
The Sunshine spread a carpet,
 And everything was grand, 
Miss Weather led the dancing, 
Professor Wind the band
                                  -George cooper

My dear readers - you often hear me wax eloquent of all things Fall .

And this fall is no different

 In the mountains, it makes you want to kiss the ground


is  slowly turning into this .

We are blanketed in red and  gold

DH and I love to take walks and we force R to come along .

R tries his best  to outline his ambitious plans of doing Wii FIt and eating Doritos, but we insist he come with us
He starts off flouncing along in a sulk

But soon he is having such a great time that he is racing along going eeeeeeee
I am so happy to be out with two of my favorite people.

We try hard to pose for pictures

Do you find it easy to get your kids to pose for a picture?

This child would much rather kiss his mother
 Or hug me  tight

Than look at the camera

When he does look at the camera we get these mealy mouthed expressions

 I give up after several tries  and pose just by myself
And then later when I download the pictures I think - R is the wiser

For surely, its better to show your love to the object of your affection than to put your love on show for someone else

Goodbye to Miss E

One of our beloved therapists is leaving - E worked with R from October 2007 to October 2010 - seeing him 4 times every week

She had a baby last november and was no longer able to see R

Finally after a year she is moving to another town

She comes to say goodbye and R is really really weird with her - ignoring her and looking quite indifferent

I am mortified because E has done SO much for us

Her daughter is really adorable and tries to get R's attention several times ( but to no avail )

But after she leaves, he cries his eyes out

Finally , he cries himself to sleep

Later on the couch I see he has snuggled up to the 3 letters S-A-D and my heart breaks for him

I always think of the way people think that auties may not feel much,

R's problem is that he feels too much.

IEP meeting 

We have a nice IEP meeting.

There are not too many services available in our school district but there are good and nice people

They are for the most part nice and sweet and they care about the kids. 

His sped teacher is very very knowledgeable about Autism and his mainstream teacher is a kind and sweet and intelligent woman
One of the teachers - his OT actually started to cry at one point in time - saying how much R touched her!

Currently he is being integrated in mainstream for half the day and in resource room for the other half

They also at the end of the meeting thanked us !!

One of them said that  they are so used to being criticized all the time - that they were very grateful to actually have someone be appreciative of them

It really makes a HUGE difference to us that R is accepted in school and I said several prayers of gratitude when I see that for the most part in elementary school all the special needs kiddos are treated with gentleness

Outside time 

We spend a lot of time outside.

The weeks at work are extremely draining and my insomnia is back. ( my mum is not very well and that contributes to my worry )  but I revive each weekend

This summer has been a scorcher and so the cooler days are very welcome

DH has been very busy with his projects and makes many martyrlike statements to me ( about how hard some people are working in sharp contradiction to some other people )

Though he also accuses me of doing the same ( being an insufferable martyr when I work while he is lazing )

As he is walking down I rap on the window to blow a kiss at him  -and  he trips and falls

I come out sympathetically, looking particularly unbecoming in my fleece robe and say

" Were you blinded by my beauty"

DH smiles and tells me "you dont know your own powers"

Of such silliness is happiness made.


Yuji said...

Ah, you live in such a beautiful area. Fall in the mountains... as a Midwesterner, I am jealous.

That is so touching that R let out his emotions after initially holding it in. We had a similar experience when our son's longtime therapist left. Our kids do feel a lot, even when they sometimes do not show it.

Bright Side of Life said...

I am sure that you look very glam in your fleece robe! :) Lovely post!

Arizaphale said...

I really enjoyed this post. The last bit about your husband is so sweet and funny and your reflections on posing for photographs are so true! We are currently trying to incorporate a little boy with Autism into one of our Reception classes. It is very difficult as he is used to running his own show and is unable to conform to any classroom expectations. He is also quite aggressive with staff and students which is making the situation with other parents very hard. *sigh* I have suggested he be based in the resource room and be gradually reintegrated in to the classroom but he will not do this either! I am so glad it is working out well for you. What a blessing.

Þorgerður said...

Awwww... I just love your writing style... you have talent.

I find my son also feeling too much at times.. just not good at expressing.
And I cringe when i think how I am teaching him that seeing is knowing or at least that seeing leads to knowing... knowing it to be so untrue at times with himself and those with the same struggles.

fall is lovely and the pictures too.

robin said...

I just love that part of the country in the fall! So beautiful! Love that you mentioned about R's feelings after his therapist left...picturing him with his letters being sad. :( He is a very caring little guy! About your hubby tripping, LOL!, that's so cute what you (and he) said!!!

Anonymous said...

the part about R crying over his beloved teacher just touched my heart. they indeed feel so much.

i always love your posts and often think of you and your dear family.

Mr. Daddy said...

another great post K :o) and your DH is absolutely right I think....

Kris said...

I loved this post, especially about fall in the mountains and R spelling out SAD. I find Alex often overwhelmed by his feelings and anyone who thinks autistic people are unfeeling have never spent much time with an autistic person. Thanks for this lovely post.

D. S. Walker said...

The fall leaves are beautiful and I am so jealous. I used to love the sound of leaves crunching under my feet and the smell of fall in the air not to mention the pretty colors.

R. is such a caring little guy and I too love the dialogue between you and your DH. Personally, I prefer snap shots over posed pictures.

Floortime Lite Mama said...

@ Yuji @ Porgerour@ Kris its so interesting that Hanabi Boy also had a similar experience and that Sturla and Alex too feels things so deeply

@DI Actually I look far from glamorous but thank you so much for the lovely comment

@ Arizaphale kudos to you for trying

@ Robin -
adored the pumpkin pix from fall in your part of the country too

@ rhemas hope - thank you so much -- your recent post by Brandon had be in tears too

@ Mr Daddy - thank you so much

@Sue - you will not believe it but I was watching the Mentalist this week - which was located on an island and I was thinking of you and thinking of the beauty you live in in Hawaii.. so beautiful it all was

Anonymous said...

I LOVE fall as well! I feel truly ALIVE in the fall. There is nothing like it!

Dealing with emotions is so hard. I've found that Daniel DOES feel and very intensely too.... he just doesn't have the ability to express what he's feeling. I wonder if that almost makes it worse to have all that feeling inside without a satisfactory way to let it out. Poor R.

I love the interaction between you and your husband. You guys make me laugh. :)

Trish said...

Loved this post, K. I know I feel happiest when my son's arms are around me.

So glad the school is giving it their all - transitions are always so hard on everyone - enjoy the rest of the fall!

Anonymous said...

Awww, I bet you looked really fetching in your fleece robe! And I'm sorry R had to say goodbye. Goodbyes can always be hard to deal with. I too, love the autumn colours, we don't get them as strong here as when I used to live in the States, I don't know if it's because the changeover from hot to cold is too quick... Enjoy!!

jazzygal said...

aww...lovely post:-) Love your mountain Fall photos...and the photos of you! Your R is a much loved little boy by all, it seems;-)

xx Jazzy

Anonymous said...

Thank you. Your posts are a gift.

Rachel said...

I am still giggling at your exchange with DH. Thankful he did not injure himself, but not quite sure he didn't speak very much the truth! :)

My heart broke over R's S-A-D letters. I can imagine it would be hard to contain that sorrow when it is right in front of yourself, and safer to express with ones he loves and knows are not going anywhere.

Praying for your Mum. How worrying.

Floortime Lite Mama said...

Darlings so so delighted that you all think the same way about fall and oour sensitive lil sweethearts

Kim said...

That back and forth with DH at the end made me giggle. I love that you record all of this, one day when you come back and read all of this you will smile!

Kim said...

That back and forth with DH at the end made me giggle. I love that you record all of this, one day when you come back and read all of this you will smile!

danette said...

I love the pictures of you and R together! He is just so sweet. I kwym about posing, it is almost impossible to get my boys to pose for pictures, especially the older two. They are just constantly in motion and even when they try to pose it is with such exaggerated expressions and still moving everywhere, very difficult to capture! I love the "continuous shooting" mode on my camera, I use it a lot with them in hopes that somewhere in the freeze frames will be a picture where I can see both of their faces and maybe even with a nice expression :). Bitty does better when he's by himself but it is definitely something we've worked on... all three of them together is almost impossible.

So sad for R, my boys have a hard time expressing their feelings too but they do feel so deeply.

I love that your IEP team is so good with R, it makes such a huge difference.

That last part with your dh really cracked me up too, so funny and sweet at the same time :).

Anonymous said...

The district is correct in saying that they often get criticized because typically districts do little for the kids and a district's intervention is almost always pathetic. Parents have every right to criticize and expect more. They like you because you ask for little, trust me. If you asked for outplacement or more expensive intervention they would turn on you. You'd be shocked but it is common.

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