I returned to my office last week to see message from R’s class-teacher, asking me to call her back
I called back – heart thumping – thinking that she would tell me that inclusion was not working out , or R was not learning anything or that he was sick or something like that
I really like Mrs M so I was hoping that it wasn’t one of the above
“Well the reason I called” , she says ,” is that he said a bad word in class”
“What word ?” I asked, confused
“The REALLY bad one… the one that starts with F…” she replied
I felt a nervous giggle coming up ( don’t you just hate those?)
She added quickly “ Well obviously I know that it could not be you guys .. I cant ever imagine you using a word like this.. you are so much better than this
This thought, while a lovely one, is patently untrue of course.
We are, in fact , not better than this at all.
We are much worse.
We are much worse.
While driving, DH regularly casts aspersions on the fellow drivers’ relations with the female members of their family.
I, when deeply moved , have in fact been known to use an expletive as an adjective or adverb.. as in “ I am so …bleep .. happy “.. this coffee is bleep awesome”
“Never”, I say piously , crossing my fingers behind my back , “we don’t even know these words”
I add the age old parent excuse “ he must have seen it on TV.. while switching channels, in fact .. we don’t really watch programs that would use terrible words”
Suddenly, a thought occurs to me
“Its his apraxia .. he has a terrible time pronouncing certain syllables .. he was probably saying .. truck or duck “
She replies “ No, no there is no confusion, he used it very appropriately” .. the computer was slow .. so he said – @#$% this and when we gave him an assignment he said “ #$%^ this “
We talked about appropriate consequences and I called DH later that day
The thing is though , neither of us was upset
You see , R only learned to speak last year
“Well it is a new word “ I say
DH added “ and he used it appropriately”
Plus its the pinnacle of language - spontaneous declarative language
Of course, we are going to make sure that R does not use a word like that again
But words came so late in our home, we can never really take them for granted
We finally, have to watch what we say in front of R
And this- having to watch ourselves- feels like a gift.
Luckily R has defended his mum and dad’s honor!
When asked where he learned this word from, he said “From Pepsi”
For our part , since DH and I are trilingual ( while R is just about lingual in English ) – we have decided to swear only in Bengali or Hindi
The wonderful Danette asks us to share a funny moment for this month’s Best of Best Bloggers which will be published on the 15th – here