Dear reader -
I must post a "VERY boring " warning before you start to read - just writing because I like to chronicle my life-so I can relive it later
Weekend in the Cabin
On Saturday DH drops me to the cabin in the morning.Me , my army of Dyson and Clorox wipes, bleach and Green works and Mr Clean and Lysol
I look around at all the mess and relish the challenge
And I enjoy myself tremendously .I am lusting for another Dyson - there really is nothing like it
I get such a sense of accomplishment from cleaning –
There is a Before K and there is a After K
And the After K is a representation of transformation that K has brought about
Buddhist monks say that cleaning is one of the most Zen tasks to do and its true
In the afternoon I have it almost all cleaned but I am dead tired – the cabin has not been in use for almost 1.5 years of its 2 year life and as its in the middle of woods its been taken over by the bugs and scary looking spiders
The rest of the family arrives in the afternoon and me and then we continue to clean together
R is quite cranky without having the internet and also without any attention from me and we make sure that we will get the internet the next time we are here (No TV though)
And I also plan to play with him incessantly - I want him to have positive association with the cabin
He really blooms when we play with him ( especially the non -challenging Sensory diet kind of play )
And I make a note to bring sensory toys next time - hammock, mini trampoline, Exercise ball, Scooter etc
There is a lovely calm feeling to life in this cabin which is what I was looking for
More calm more contentment and more gratitude
Did you know that research shows that there is one single thing that differentiates happy people from sad people?
It is not money, health, good looks, security or youth ?
Its gratitude !
And I try to focus on it consciously
R is soooo happy to be home –
I realize that slowly over the past years our home is a sensory playground of sorts- swings, swimming pool, hammocks, sandpits, slides, trampolines abound here and R can provide himself a sensory diet of with ease
I must make sure that he can meet his sensory needs in the cabin as well
Slowly R is starting to have a few sentences as well
His therapist texts me in tears the other day.
R has said "G put on baby blanket" ( asking her to play peek a boo ) with him
Not just this, he is showing an interest in languages –
The other day I wake up to R practicing Chinese
He has modifies his Baby Einstein DVD so it is in Chinese and he is pausing and repeating the words
My dad has astrology for a hobby and has predicted that R will be multilingual
Two years ago – when R had no words – I used to smile indulgently at this prediction that my Dad would make so confidently
R is really into shapes these days
While sitting on the potty – he takes a square of toilet paper and tells me to sing the Square song ( Susie Square has just four sides…)
Then he tilts it so it looks like a diamond and asks me to sing the Diamond song ( denny diamond is my name )
When I watch R thinking, It always reinforces my belief that autism does not mean MR
Its like the world has decided that you must be good at doing xyz and only then are you intelligent
And therefore that many autistic children have MR
Completely untrue as ASD kiddos may not understand what you say when you want them to do x, y or z,
Further they may not have the motivation to show you
Even if those two things are passed ie they understand and have the motivation but still are not able to do it - even that does not mean cognitive chanllenges
For they may do other things very well - not knowing X YZ does not mean they do not know A B & C
Also when I hear other people say that R is so bright he is like an Einstein - I dont buy that either ( though its lovely to hear )
R is an ordinarily clever child
Yes even at 5 he knows many facts that a neurotypical child would not but that is because its his focus.
He does not spend time on social interaction
R's ABA therapist tells me in the evening that he reached over where she was doing the tallies
And he scored his sheet himself and ( circles all the I's himself , I for independant , to show that he did these things independantly )
We are seeing a lot of progress lately and I am really starting to think about something unusual
That a version of homeschool may be the best bet for him
By that, I dont mean only DH and I teaching -
I mean a combination of tutors and therapists instead of school
MIL and SIL leave for India - they have been here 3 months and are very very weepy to be leaving us and R
When R sees the packed bags he is very anxious
But he later is very relaxed when he realizes that they are going and its not he -himself who is moving out or something
The coming and goings of his extended family from India is something he is very used to and this is nornal
R did not sleep much last night and he is cranky - bursting into tears that I will not let Tuck come inside the swimming pool - and giggly in the evening and goes to sleep in the night for a solid 12 hours !
I start back on THE FIRM ( exercise videos )
I really enjoy myself -but its soooooo exhausting - I am simply wiped out which makes me realise all the more how much I need to exercise
R is very charming in the evening - He has slept 12 hours the past night and is just in full bloom
DH and I always say that the best and most effective therapy for R is sleep
In the Floortime session in the evening he is very flexible, with it and just very interested in everything
I see him with his DVD - trying to pause on an unfamiliar word and try to say it out properly and phonetically
He spells out "Brandissimo" ( the name of the company ) each letter separate and uttered phonetically and then says it out together
I meet DH and R at the mall
We always shop together for household stuff - this is one of the things we love to do together
I really think find it quite romantic to select the mundane things that make up the physical structure of our home
Saturday and Sunday
DH chops all meat and veggies and I cook and we are all done by 1 -
We drive off to the cabin
R is lackadaisical about the cabin until we discover the community Pool
He has a BLAST in the pool and now is really warming up to the cabin -
he is super tired from the pool and falls asleep right after bath and dinner
DH and I have tomato basil soup( all fm DH's garden and VERY flavorful ) - I really could not love summer more
I have my first Moose Munch ever - its an expereince to remember
Though the day will end on a grumpy note - with DH and I - overtired and moving a big piece of furniture around what will always remain with me is the afternoon
In the afternoon - it rains heavily - I make a pot of Starbucks and we sit on the porch
And a rainbow comes out for our viewing pleasure
It seems to me that there is no artist like the one above
These beautiful woods
This lovely home
This content life
What a gorgeous cabin!! I predict there will be many happy moments spent there!!
I feel calmer just reading this! R sounds like he is doing so well...I agree with you that they should neither be labeled as MR or geniuses. The important thing is that they continue progressing in a positive direction and that their talents are leveraged to the most benefit.
Firstly-this was so NOT boring..it was fascinating because of the honesty of the detail..Oh how I love my dyson as well...and household shopping as a family...or sometimes as just a date between myself and Omar-Alone! is terribly romantic..moose munch..a taste of heaven..Your little guy sounds terrific and wonderful and joyful..one of my boys does the same thing to DVDs...changing the language..We went into a Chinese restaurant recently, and Oscar greeted the proprietors in Chinese..It sounds and looks as if you had a lovely time...:)
I am Zen like you. (Housework gives me a good feeling - uhm, finishing housework gives me a good feeling. That's the same, correct?)
I do not know what a moose munch is.
I want to encourage you in making your individual school choice for R - but do not mean to influence you a particular way - encourage you to make the choice. I think you know what I mean.
I am thankful for you and your writing here on your blog. Calms me, too (Lynn).
Not boring at all, K!
I love hearing about R's progress, your dad may prove to be right in his prediction :).
The cabin is beautiful, sounds like a peaceful place to make family memories :).
Many spiders went into the Dyson-knock-off void today at my house! Sharing with someone who will appreciate it! Barbara
Thank you all so much for the kind comments
TOTALLY appreciate the vaccuum story Barb
Your cabin looks SO awesome! I love your posts! I agree with what you say about the difference between a happy and sad person (gratitude.) I
Post a Comment